You know what? I’m not going to lose 101 pounds. I’m going to throw that crap away. Weight loss? Try weight toss. But before I get into the details of that, can we talk about the crazy person who penned the phrase “Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.”?
Because clearly, that person has never had the pleasure of indulging in a bowl of piping hot fresh-from-the-oven homemade apple crisp topped with cinnamon ice cream.
I’m drooling a little bit now. Yep. My mouth is watering.
But my love of these sweet treats has gotten me into trouble. I mean, clearly, if I have 101 pounds to lose, I’ve enjoyed a dessert or two. I love sugar. The curse of the sweet tooth is strong in my life.
So for the past 38 years, I’ve been eating basically whatever I want. Those days are over. From now on I have to take control. A doctor is supervising me on this journey, and if you want to undertake some serious weight loss, I suggest you do the same. I am not a health professional and I cannot give you advice.
I am just here to share my journey. There. Now that we’ve gotten all the legalese out of the way, I’m going to throw away 101 pounds.
101. Such a strange number. Not an even 100, but 101. When I first went to my doctor, who treats obesity as a medical condition, I underwent a battery of tests and number crunching. The number that came up was 101.
I like it. I like that it’s not an even 100. It’s like going that extra mile. Giving it 101%. Just rocking it a little more. It’s my magic weight loss number. I can feel it, this one’s a winner.
Why I want to lose the weight.
So here’s the thing. I’m healthy. I have good blood pressure, no heart issues, good cholesterol, no thyroid issue, I’m the healthiest fat person you’ll ever meet. For me, fat is not an insult, it’s merely an accurate adjective. I know how to dress for my body, I take care of myself, and I’m happy. Fat does not equal unhealthy or unhappy.
However, there are societal limits for a fat person, things I can’t count on being able to do, things that are more difficult to accomplish, things that cause other people to be uncomfortable, or make me uncomfortable or insecure. Because of that, I’ve made a list of reasons or motivations for undergoing this weight loss.
- I want to fit on rides at amusement parks without fear. So far, I haven’t taken my kids to an amusement park. Well, that’s not entirely true. We lucked into a 2 day Disneyland vacation last summer. But I had to be very particular about the types of rides I went on because I didn’t want to be an embarrassment to my kids or husband if I tried to get into a seat and the harness wouldn’t buckle over my chest or belly.
- I don’t want to be an embarrassment to my kids. No matter how aware I am of society’s influence, or how against the “norms” of beauty standards I am, the reality is, kids don’t get that. Since I was bullied my entire life, for many reasons, I don’t want to give anyone a tactic to use against my children that may cause them to be embarrassed.
- I want to like shopping for clothes, and I want to be able to pay less for them. Fact: most “plus size” clothing costs more, and it’s much harder to find things that fit because bodies are all differently shaped, in more ways than a “traditional” slim body. I would love to be able to walk into the Gap and buy a $10 t-shirt instead of having to special order larger ones on the internet. And please. Do not get me started on bras. (I have had great luck with Gwynnie Bee and Dia & Co though, check ’em out)
- I don’t want to worry about health later, coming from a family rife with type II diabetes. My mom, aunt, 3 grandparents, biological father, another aunt, and a cousin all have it. I don’t. Annual tests assure me that I don’t, but that doesn’t mean I won’t. The number one way to lower my risk, the only one I can control, is weight loss.
How I’m going to do it
- Like I said earlier, I’m working with my doctor. Our first goal was to get my anxiety under control and then address the newly discovered metabolic disorder. (Like I said, a lot of tests were done.) I’m attending nutrition classes and working on adding exercise and overcoming that sugar addiction.
- Kicking the soda. I don’t drink much alcohol, and I don’t smoke (anymore), but I love me some soda. So far, I made the switch from regular to diet. I know, I know, diet isn’t much better. Baby steps.
- One step-at-a-time. Now that the anxiety and metabolism are under control, I’m focusing on regular, healthy breakfasts. Then I’ll move on to lunch, snacks, dinner, whatever.
- Running. By running I mean walking slowly. But I’ve joined a local running group, and I plan to continue into the fall. It’s not much, but it’s exercise. Something I really hate.
I have big goals. This is just one of them, but it’s a doozy (doozie? we should take a poll). I have every intention of reaching this one, no matter the roadblocks I hit. I’d love to hear your stories and tips, share them in the comments.
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